An emo me

Today I'm very emotional.Dont know why la.PMS kott? :p

After a few events that occured today, I wish I am a very expert doctor!

"Live life to the fullest...but you must know your limitations and responsibilities!!"

-quoted by Dr Halina Yunos-

(alaaa wife Dr Sheikh Muszaphar tu laa)

Makin lama duk dalam clinical posting ni, makin saya realize being a doctor is not easy, at all.

(yes no doubt with the other professions also but I focused on medical profession because it's what I'm going to be in 1 year time insyaAllah)

One scenario.

She is a houseman officer who is oncall. After review patients in the ward at that night, she was called by A&E people to review a 60 years old patient who presented with chest pain. Urgent blood investigations were out and showed hyperkalaemia. So, what should she do?

"You are not graduated from medical schools if you dont know how to treat hyperkalaemia."

-quoted by a registrar (doctor who will become a specialist soon)-

Nampak macam small matter..alaa potassium je pon tinggi..no big deal la..and you dig your own grave!

Patient can die with hyperkalaemia you know. How? Google eh? :)

And today, I asked myself,

"Am I qualified enough to have the title 'Dr' in front of my name??"

Aiyooo...boleh pengsan bila fikir :P

Sometimes kan I feel like I take this for granted. Always make it in the simplest way although it is not simple AT ALL. Go ward rounds, seminars, classes, teachings, fullfill the logbook requirements and at the end, I learned nothing. Oh my goodness! Very bad attitude lah.

"Remember, you (later when become a houseman officer) are the 1st liner. You are the first one who will clerk the patient  before others. So you must know what to do, what to elicit."

-quoted again-

Conclusion.

1 year left for me to polish everything that I'm lacking of.

::::: surgery posting :::::

• Rasa macam makin makin jauh from my spiritual source....Astaghfirullahalazim
• The One that you should seek for is Allah SWT The Almighty

'Terkenang Semasa Dulu' Part I

~22 tahun yang lalu

Memang tak boleh tahan gelak betol la setiap kali tgk gambar ni  :p

Masing2 muka innocent + blur + tak tau pape

17 budak kecik ; 9 boys + 8 girls 

Ini semua adalah cucu Tok Wan Mahmood & Tok Che Halimah

(psstt : exclude Atin, Okie & Sarah sebab tak lahir lagi masa ni)

Average umur adalah 14 tahun - 1 tahun (maybe??)

And I was the youngest ok!Hahaaa

Btw, jumpa tak cik manis ishanokokoro kat mana?? (carik sendiri!) 

P/s : kalau raya tahun ni masing2 duk posisi yg sama macam ni, agak2 possible tak?? :p

Baca komen2 ni pon dah satu hal gelak tak berhenti

Sakit orbicularis oris malam tu

Jaw pun rasa ketat semacam 

Hadoiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

Tak sabarnyaaaaaaaaa nak tunggu Family Day tahun niiiiiiiiii

Abang2 & Kakak2 semua dah sibuk kumpul gambar2 lama yang mostly black & white

Sesuai dengan tema!

Bila tengok gambar2 scan yang upload kat  Membunga Interaktif  plus plan 'orang2 tua' kat  blog , ohh lagi laa excited!

Btw, masa tu saya tengah posting Oftal.

Agak2 boleh tak hilang sekejap-sekejap dari kelas? Ngeee ~

-tajuk entri tak bleh blah..part 1 konon

-tgk2 laa kalu rajin2 nanti, i uplad lah yang part II pulak eh..insyaAllah

The kids are awesome!

MEDICAL

PSYCHIATRIC

NEUROLOGY

OBSTETRIC & GYNAECOLOGY (O&G)

PAEDIATRIC

SURGERY

ORTHOPEDIC

OFTHALMOLOGY

OTORINOLARYNGOLOGY (ORL)

Just finished my paediatric posting, a 6 weeks posting with the kids who are the most awesome creatures of God in earth! Yeahh I adore kids so much :D

Someone asked me, "Nanti nak ambik pakar apa?"

"Ntah"

"Paediatrician cam sesuai"

Yes it's true that I love to play with kids but doesn't mean that I have to become a paediatric consultant right?

Sometimes kan rasa macam nak ambik part time job kat nursery so that I can cuddle all the babies there everyday, everytime I like even when they are sleeping! Haha ~

Back to my past 6 weeks in paediatric posting, I met a lot of kids. From 1 day old until 17 years old. Yes as long as you are school-aged, you will be put in paediatric ward if you are given the 'chance' to be admitted. And those kids of course were not well. And the illness that I encountered most was respiratory infection in which it could be as simple as pharyngitis, bronchiolitis, pneumonia or life threatening status asthmaticus. Not to be forgotten, febrile fit in children (second most common in the list after asthma). So watch out if your child is having fever with a spiking temperature, almost 40 C ok!

Other than those kids in which their illness can be prevented and treated well, I was able to meet more serious cases. I met a 3 months old baby with cystic hygroma with a suction tube connected to her enlarged neck, a 2 years old boy with Tetralogy of Fallot (a congenital heart disease) presented with hypercyanotic spell (bluish discolouration of hands, foot, lip), a 4 years old girl with cerebral palsy (a neurological disorder originate from the brain), hydrocephalus baby, leukemic patients and many more. 

One scenario. During my posting at HRPZII, I met this 4 months old baby girl. Presented with fast breathing, actually she has underlying Kabuki Syndrome (a genetic problem with multiple complications) and Patent Ductus Arteriosus ( a heart problem in which the blood vessel which supposed to close after birth is still there). She needed to be supplied with continuous oxygen using mask that cover all of her face & head ( I forgot the name) and being fed with the milk using tube. The lines were here & there and physically, she appeared obviously different from a normal child. Both of her parents were there by her side (everyday). On my last day there, she was severely tachypnoiec and was sent to ICU. Her parents were just cool but I could sense the worries on their face. 

Sungguh, bukan calang-calang hamba Allah yang mampu terima dugaan seperti ini. Saya selalu terfikir bagaimana seorang ibu/ayah  mampu menjadi begitu kuat tika harus menjaga seorang anak yang tidak sempurna seperti kanak-kanak yang lain? Apatah lagi saat mula2 mendapat tahu bahawa si kecil itu tidak sempurna? Saya tidak punya jawapannya namun saya yakin mereka seorang yang SANGAT SANGAT SANGAT kuat. Anak kecil itu juga kuat. Jika tidak, masakan Allah SWT menguji mereka sedemikian rupa? Senang sahaja kita untuk berkata itu & ini namun yang merasai & menanggungnya ialah mereka. Doa saya agar Allah SWT sentiasa bersama mereka. Ameen ~

Since then, I realized one thing. Be grateful! We were a baby before, a kid and a child who grew normally as the other children. Been born without serious complication that might affect our growth. We played everything we want without limit. In short, we enjoyed our childhood. But not all children of the same age as us were able to do that. They have limits. If not, it might worsen their illness. So tepuk dada, tanya iman. Sudah cukup bersyukur ke kita?

 Our last day in paediatric posting
And I'm going to miss all those kids
May He bless all of you!

Without him

It had been 6 years...how time flies...

And this is the first wedding preparation in our family...without him

Perkahwinan Akak pada tahun 2004 adalah perkahwinan yang pertama & yang terakhir kiranya yang sempat diuruskan oleh arwah

Saya masih ingat lagi waktu sehari sebelum hari bahagia akak.Malam tu, memang riuh rendah sangat rumah kami. Hampir semua sanak saudara ada, yang jauh, yang dekat.Ye la first wedding ceremony dalam MCC! Masing-masing datang membantu membuat persiapan terakhir majlis. Bunga telur, siso, hantaran, bla bla bla...Dan bila sampai part pelamin, ramai yang tak puas hati sebabnya siling rumah guna lampu kalimantang! Of course tak cantik la kalau on the light nanti kan. Kata nak buat background siling ala-ala hotel punya wedding. So kitorang pon pakat-pakat la usya arwah mintak belikan lampu chandelier pasang kat siling tengah ruang tamu.

"Ba,tak cantik la lampu tu kat tengah2 siling tu. Apa kata kita tukar lampu yang macam kat hotel tu ok tak? Barula la ada umphh" *wink wink*

Tanpa banyak soal, arwah terus setuju. Ooh how surprise! But, that was our late Baba. He always wanted the best for us. Ouchh seriously, I cannot bear the tears everytime I'm thinking of him T_T

Al-Fatihah....

Last Friday night, as usual, we had solat hajat & reciting Yaasin ceremony in Tok's house. Cik Wan buat makan2 sikit lepas tu dan masa tengah makan2 tu, ada la bincang sikit2 pasal wedding my brother nanti. Nak set meja makan beradap kat mana, meja tetamu kat mana, pelamin, hantaran & what so ever. Suddenly I saw hidung Mama merah. Mama tunduk jer. I noticed the tears rolling down Mama's cheek! I knew she was crying at that time. And I could smell the reason. Managing a wedding of her son without husband by her side is a hard task, I bet! Although she has 4 other children to help her, it is still different. Plus with the full support given by her ipar duai ( baba's siblings because mama is anak tunggal), mama mungkin rasa sangat2 terharu, maybe. And this brought tears in my eyes as well T_T

"Kak Mi jangan risau. Kita buat best2 punya majlis Imi nanti. Tak cukup tenaga, kita kerah jugak bagi cukup." Cik Wan & Cik Uly kalau tak buat lawak memang tak sah. Masing2 cuba nak sedapkan hati Mama.

The next day, while watching tv at home, I asked her ...

"Ma, nanti Imi kahwin, dia nak buat tema kaler apa eh? Kena la bagitau awal2 kan, nanti tak sempat plak nak jahit baju."

"Mama pun tak tau la Nana. Mama tak boleh nak fikir dah. Setiap kali Mama fikir, Mama mesti teringatkan Baba. "

Ouchh stupid me!Why did I ask that question to her??
Kalau previously Mama ada arwah untuk sama2 pening fikir pasal majlis kahwin Akak, but this time, Mama as the only parent has to manage it by herself so that majlis nanti insyaAllah tak ada cacat celanya. So it will be a big task for her.

Anyway, dont worry Mom. We are all here. Let's make it simple but nice *as Imi said*

Very looking forward to that ceremony. Hoping that it's going to be smooth and everyone will be happy. Eceewaahh macam my wedding plak :p

And to the queen of my heart, pleaseeeee be happy Mama dear :))) We are going to have a new member in the family and I'm going to have a new 'kakak' after this. Oohh excited terlebih :p Tapi rasanya tak boleh lawan my 'original' Akak yang super duper best la kot!teehee

*Happy Engaged to my brother & his lovely fiancee*

 ~(^_____________^)~